| Focus December 1, 2005
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This photo of Nina was
taken backstage at the 2004 South-Central Ontario Championships.
(photo June 2004 by Doug Schneider) |
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Determination
Special guest editorial by Nina Luchka, 2005 IFBB North
American Overall Figure Champion and IFBB Pro
"Strength does not come from winning. Your
struggles develop your strength. When you go through hardship and decide NOT to surrender,
that is strength."
-- Arnold Schwarzenegger
It’s been a long, hard struggle for me over the past
three years. It all started back in the fall of 2002, when I was on my way down to Ohio
for a photoshoot and to work with my trainer, that I experienced my first anxiety attack.
It was very mild, yet very scary. I didn’t know what it was, actually, and I
didn’t consult any doctors.
The next year, I was getting ready for 2003 Canadian Figure
Championships. I signed up, I was training hard, but I had too much stress in my life at
that time. My body could not deal with it all, and the bouts of anxiety I was experiencing
became more frequent and more intense. In fact, I ended up in the hospital emergency room
quite a few times, so about a month before the show I had to pull out. I was completely
devastated. My dream was to obtain an IFBB Pro Card and become a professional figure
competitor, but when it was within my reach I had to drop out and lose every chance of
realizing it. I took it very hard and was so upset I wanted nothing to do with fitness or
working out, and I didn’t want to talk to anyone in the fitness industry. I simply
stopped going to the gym, I stopped my workouts with my trainer, I stopped keeping in
touch with others in the industry, and I stopped checking the fitness-related websites. I
was mad at myself and also ashamed – mad because I never give up on anything I’m
trying to achieve, and ashamed because I didn’t want anyone to think that I was
giving up or that I was scared to compete at the national level.
It wasn’t until September 2003, when I spoke to the
Ontario-based promoter, Jim Morris, that things started to get better. He had asked me to
help out at one of his shows, and I agreed to. Then, somehow, Jim persuaded me to enter
his London show that was to be held in November. It took some convincing, but I did. To
make a long story short, as ill-prepared as I was, I competed in the show and I loved
every minute of it. The competition bug bit me again. I was back and raring to go. Quite
simply, stepping out on a competition stage is an amazing, unexplainable feeling. In fact,
I become a different person when I’m out onstage.
As a result, I continued to compete, winning the Tall class
at the 2004 Canadian Figure Championships. Even though I wasn’t really ready for it,
I competed at the 2004 North American Championships and I placed fourth. My anxiety was so
bad at that time, that I knew I had to do that show in order to start fighting the
problem. I wasn’t going to let it take over my life. It was very hard for me to get
to the show, and, also, between rounds I had to lie on the floor in the hallway with my
eyes closed. Every time I would open my eyes the room was spinning like crazy. Actually, I
was very close to pulling out of the show after the first round. However, I did not want
this anxiety to get the better of me and run my life. Of all the shows, that 2004 North
Americans was the hardest. I’ve never had an anxiety attack as bad as the one I had
at that show. I still can’t believe I competed. But it did help with fighting the
anxiety and, like I said, I ended up fourth.
The next year, I placed second in the Tall class at the
2005 Canadian Figure Championships. After that, I entered the 2005 North American
Championships in September and I not only won my class, but the Overall title too. So, two
years after almost deciding never to step out onstage again, I earned my IFBB Pro Card. My
dream for about ten years had come true.
"The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can
envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe
100 percent."
-- Arnold Schwarzenegger
I can’t even begin to explain the feeling I
experienced when I was announced the 2005 North American Overall Figure Champion. The only
things that kept running through my head while onstage were, "I did it! After
everything I’ve been through! My brother and mom would be so proud of me. All the
anxiety, emergency room visits, stomach problems, dizziness from anxiety, people saying
‘You’ll never do it.’ I did it for my brother, my mom, and myself." It
still brings me to tears thinking about it. I did a lot of soul-searching, reading, and
listening to others. I had to let go of any negative friends who were around me, and
search for what "Nina" needed to get through it all.
The anxiety I experienced is partially a result of the many
things that have happened in my life, but, in particular, losing my brother because of an
accident, which was devastating for me, and losing my mom to cancer. I watched my mom get
weaker and weaker every day, and then I watched her die – I thought I would never
recover from it. Actually, I haven’t fully recovered, because that is how my anxiety
started and I still suffer from it – the attacks are just not as frequent or severe.
Still, I’ve learned to control it, and still attain my goals.
So, if I can do it, you can do it – anyone can
do it. If you have a goal or a dream, believe me, nothing can stop you. Think about who you
really are, and what you truly want to do with your life. Let your best vision of
who you are, and of who you can be, guide the choices that you make every moment. Life can
be easy, haphazard, and empty, or it can be focused, directed, and full. The choices you
make will make you who you choose to be.
"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter
of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."
-- William Jennings Bryan
...Nina Luchka
You can learn more about Nina at her website, www.fitness-fox.com. |
